DO NOT BE AFRAID

In the spring of 1994, I was on top of the world. I would graduate with my master’s degree and move to a new town, where a new job, apartment and a bright loving future waited for me. A late-night phone call changed everything. The godly man of my dreams was given little chance to live.

For months I wrestled conflicting emotions: denial, anger, sadness … even hope, but overwhelming disappointment is what I remember the most. I was disappointed with God. I believed God had brought us together. Why would He tear our lives apart? I was a faithful believer, but I suddenly distrusted the message of God’s loving care. That Easter I could not see the light and hope of Jesus as Savior, only the disappointment over the loss of my planned future.

Whenever I read today’s scripture lesson, I am certain that Mary Magdalene and the other Mary must have wrestled with the same emotions. Imagine their disappointment as they approached Jesus’ tomb. Surely they questioned why things had turned out so horribly wrong. They had followed Jesus faithfully. They knew, firsthand, the transforming power of His love and witnessed the miracles of His ministry. They thought He would be the King, a redeemer who would give them a secure future, but were left to contend with a dead body. Their future was as bleak as the pre-dawn night.

Yet, when the Angel of the Lord met them at the tomb, their disappointment turned into delight. The death they had witnessed wasn’t the end of the story. The disciples could only begin to understand the significance of Jesus’ resurrection. In hindsight, we see how God’s love orchestrated a better plan. The death and resurrection of Jesus accomplished a greater good -- hope for all of creation not just a brighter future for His small band of followers.

Like the disciples, I will never fully understand why the events of my life unfolded the way they did. Still, I gladly testify to you that God never abandoned me to my doubt and disappointment. Over the last 12 years, I have certainly grown, learned more about the promises of God, about love and about how I live out my faith in community with other believers. I have learned, once again, to celebrate the light of the risen Christ. The opportunities I have to minister in Jesus’ name and to teach His Word bring me joy. I might have missed these experiences if I’d been granted the future I had planned for myself. I might have missed being here with my new family at The Church of the Good Shepherd.

— Penny G. Rasnake

Courtesy of The Church of the Good Shepherd United Methodist